Don’t let the term “domestic violence” fool you. Sometimes called “domestic abuse,” it doesn’t always mean physical violence. And, it isn’t always directed at women, men can be victims too. Abuse is non-discriminating: it can happen regardless of age, gender, sexual orientation, social-economic status, culture, or occupation. Although some men suffer victimization from domestic violence in silence—believing that a real man will just deal with it and not burden others—you don’t have to be alone. At the Men’s Resource Center of West Michigan, we provide a range of services to help men who are victims of domestic violence and men who themselves are abusive and/or controlling.
Are You Abusive to Your Intimate Partner?
It could be name-calling; telling your partner she’s worthless or a bad mother. It could be controlling behavior; finding ways to keep your partner from doing what he wants to do by taking his car keys, or tracking his communications by checking his cell phone or social media accounts. It could be economical; not allowing your partner to have access to finances or a job. It could be through intimidation; yelling or slamming doors. Or, it could be isolating; keeping your partner from family and friends. And, yes, it can mean physical violence.
If this sounds a little too familiar, you’re not alone. You’re like thousands of other men who have struggled with abuse and/or control in their intimate relationships. Like some, you may only exhibit abusive behavior periodically. Or, like others, you may have found yourself stuck in an abusive pattern. You know what you’re doing isn’t working, but you don’t know what else to do. In fact, you’ve probably asked yourself the same questions: How did it get this bad? Why do I get so angry? Why do I say and do those things? How do I stop acting this way?